So I noticed today that it's been a while since I actually posted. Being a busy toddler mom, rehab appointments twice a week, and just trying to enjoy summer has got a girl swamped some days!
My 2 year anniversary came and went, and with that day came some big emotions and 2 appointments in one day. (which I don't usually like to do, especially with the first one being vision therapy. I'm usually exhausted right after) My vision therapy sessions have definitely been helping. I've noticed my left eye is improving, and with that also have noticed that my overstimulation episodes have decreased. We're taking the month of August off because my vision therapist is away, but that doesn't mean I don't get to take the month off! I have to put my time in if I want to get my moneys worth. So I have a homework plan that k follow, 5 days a week and just spread out throughout the day so it doesn't interfere with being a mom! It's going super well actually, my husband has been helping me with a few tasks aswell so it gives us "us" time.
I also had a meeting with my occupational therapist the same day. We got together to discuss my neurophysiological assessment results, make some new goals and just basically see where we're at and how we're feeling with everything. My results made it clear that I will NOT be allowed to return to my previous job due to safety reasons, but also any job realistically. He suggested a good job for me would be "stocking shelves in a wear house, at night, by myself, for a couple hours because that's all I would be able to handle". I came to terms with that at the end of July, but talking about it again kind of made me sad but grateful in a way I guess? The only positive thing about this is that I get to be a full time stay at home mom, and I get to spend as much time with my daughter as I can! So I mean yes it's upsetting, I knew to some degree that I wasn't going back but to have it set in stone now and told to me again kinda poured some salt in the healing wound.. however I get to do what I love even more then my old job, I get to spend time with my girl! So with that news then, I had to readjust my "recovery goals." My left hand has improved a lot, and since I won't be needing it to be back to its 10000% to be operating equipment, I said I'd be okay with taking a pause on that and working more on my short term memory (because it is awful) as well as my behavioural stuff... Ie. reading the room, controlling my irritability, recognizing that when I say something hurtful that there's an actual person on the receiving end that has feelings, and working on fixing my "no filter" and getting my "inhibition" back so I stop putting my foot in my mouth. My OT said that a CBT therapist would be beneficial for that, but he'll do what he can to help me himself first. I've heard of CBT (Cognitive Behavioural Therapy) so I've looked into it but my mindset is already pretty positive towards this situation, and I've started practicing mindfulness, I also really like working with my counsellor so I wasn't sure it would be a good fit for me! I posted on a TBI Facebook group that I'm apart of and asked if people thought it was beneficial for their recovery. Some people swore by it, other people found DBT (Dialectical Behavioural Therapy) more helpful, that basically teaches you how to manage and regulate your emotions. I've never heard of this before so as I researched it more, I came to realize that this would be more beneficial for me as opposed to CBT.
I had a session with my counsellor yesterday and asked her about it. I told her I wasn't looking to start fresh with someone else but asked if I could maybe see someone for the emotional stuff because she didn't "specialize" in it. She told me that she can definitely help me with the dbt part as much as she can, she's touched on it in school and he can do some research and see what tools she can find to help me out, she sent me some links to some stuff that she already knows about, I read through them lastnight and I think they're gunna help forsure.
A couple of things she sent to me to look into are
-name it to tame it (yes it's what they teach children but if it works for them it can work for anyone!
-RAIN ( recognize, acknowledge, investigate, and nurture)
I really resonated with these and I feel like if I stop and take a minute to breath mid ourburst they'll definitely help keep me in check!
I feel like im constantly learning new things about myself, learning about new treatments, new ways to help myself. Im feeling really good about how everything is coming along, I feel like everything is just kinda flowing without as many speed bumps. I'm just finally enjoying life as much as I can now, and really trying to just live in the moment and I'm really loving that. 💖
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